hoboken411

Archived Posts from "'Recent Incidents'"

Hoboken not safe for cars!

NW Hoboken continues to be stolen rim headquarters

Unreal – we have a string of evidence in this post alone, about how the NW area of the city is the “Newark of Hoboken.” This happened just to the north of Shoprite.

I can see how this is possible, though – because it doesn’t take more than 3 minutes max to get all four rims off a car these days with high-power battery-operated impact wrenches readily available.

And what would a “Warning: Do NOT park your car here if you want to KEEP your rims!” sign cost the city? Like a under $100. Would save a lot of headaches for drivers (and police.)

You can imagine the city trying to spin this into a “get out of your cars” initiative.

But just try riding your bicycle on your first date in 25 degree weather. Odds of scoring? Zero.

stolen rims hoboken NJ

Click to see previous “vehicular victims…”

Watch your boxes! (Holiday Edition)

Update: Boxes being nicked in broad daylight

Wanted to bump this ongoing “public service announcement” to remind you slackers that boxes are still getting cleaned out of multi-unit buildings at a breakneck pace again this season.

Just a few days ago, one lobby in a midtown building had a couple dozen shipments stolen.

The thief rolled a shopping cart from A&P Supermarket into the building. Apparently people are too busy updating facebook on their phones and can’t be bothered to look around anymore.

stolen boxes hoboken NJ

Boxes will always be stolen in Hoboken

6/18/2014 Update:

Living in a multi-unit apartment building has it’s pros and cons. The “mailroom” is one of the cons. So many deliveries ripe for the taking. “Common sense” could solve the problem, but that’s a story for another day. Here’s some info about the current crop of box-nickers in Hoboken.

One thief arrested: Fernando Serrano

Good news, one Fernando Serrano was arrested yesterday. He hails from Union City, NJ. (Thanks 9th St. Light Rail Station for the contribution!)

Don’t worry, he’ll be free again soon – or someone just like him will take the baton.

Fernando Serrano Hoboken package thief arrested NJ

Another package thief prowling around Hoboken

There’s another box-thief on the loose – as we received this security-footage montage earlier today.

Recognize him? Call Hoboken Police at (201)420-2100 with anything to help put an end to this horrific loss of material goods.

Hoboken Box Robber

Top 5 Recommendations to avoid lobby theft in Hoboken:

  1. Never have deliveries sent to your apartment if you’re typically not home. As a reminder, you can:
    • Befriend a local business (dry cleaner, bodega, etc.) and have your shipments sent there,
    • Use a place like Go Postal that will receive your boxes for a modest fee (and even deliver them when convenient)
  2. Tell your condo to either move or block the mailbox area – or install frosted glass doors outside.
  3. Have your stuff shipped to your work (if you’re not too weak and lazy to use a little effort to carry it home…)
  4. Live in a better building (i.e., with a concierge – but the drawback is that they’ll see you stumble home drunk missing a heel…)
  5. Stop buying so much shit online

Have any suggestions? Click to see Hoboken411′s previous tips for safe shipping!

Petty criminals are NOT news {Carmine Carpino}

Hoboken resident Carmine Carpino just a petty criminal

Some 73 year old Hoboken resident Carmine Carpino was “picked up” (i.e. “arrested”) for stealing a jalopy in Hackensack the other day. Apparently this geezer has five dozen arrests on his rap sheet during his seven-plus decades being alive.

Previous charges have included shoplifting, “improper behavior” and “lewdness,” amongst several others. Those are fairly consistent with excess alcohol consumption in our opinion (mugshot below is fairly obvious).

Carmine Carpino Hoboken NJ Arrest

Reporting petty crimes (exclusive or not) doesn’t help society

One egocentric tool-bag NJ reporter mentioned this to us the other day, citing “exclusive coverage” of this otherwise useless piece of information. There are millions of petty crimes committed daily. Why we would get our pants warm and fuzzy over a small-time crook like this is beyond explanation.

Why is it that certain meager media outlets get all excited in their “little worlds,” but cannot comprehend the MASSIVE DAILY CRIMES other entities commit (pretty much “legally”) every day?

Price fixing, laws that are unconstitutional, the reduction of our rights, and other “police state” nonsense that is growing more prevalent by the day – but “small time” reporters feel so egotistical with boring shit like a geezer who is just trying to live?

Better questions (rather than just “reporting” on some stupid police reports NO ONE cares about – because they’re ALL cookie cutter) are:

  • Why is Carmine such a criminal? Where did he go wrong? Why is he so old – yet still feels the need to steal? Does he have government income?
  • Has he hurt anyone lately? Who are his victims? “Things,” “People,” “Monetary units?”
  • Does he have a drug problem? Why? How did it happen?
  • Where is his family? Does he have one? Any kids?
  • What kind of skills does he have? Did he go to school? Where did he work?

These types of stories are what keeps the dopey local “evening news” in business. Because all of you enable it. “OH, one guy hit another guy over the head with a sock of marbles and took his wallet!” or “Wow, a car plowed into a bodega and someone got hurt…”

I guess these things might be relevant, because the people immediately in the vicinity might be curious about what happened. But someone 20 or 50 blocks away? Does it really matter at that point? Why not just yearn to learn about EVERY SINGLE TRAFFIC MISHAP GLOBALLY? You’d NEVER figure it all out. It’s all just “local.”

In the end – whether you label yourself as a “journalist,” “reporter,” or “correspondent,” it doesn’t matter – unless you inspire THOUGHT in your readers. A good “writer” will challenge conventional wisdom, and break barriers to what is otherwise known as “groupspeak.”

The story about this petty criminal – despite his “long rap sheet” has more behind it. “So fucking what” he did what he did. More important is asking WHY it happened, and how to find a deeper meaning to it all. Sometimes the net result of our ridiculous society is insanity – and justifiably so.

St. Ann’s Crash

St. Ann’s Crash {Facebook is not that important!}

Oh brother. A white Ford Explorer went careening into (and through) the cinder-block wall surrounding the parking lot over at St. Ann’s Church earlier this morning.

One can wonder how something like this happens on a low-speed residential intersection with a stop sign.

You can probably safely guess that it was a distracted driver checking out their timeline on the “smart phone.” People should realize not ONE single thing that happens on “Facebook” is important enough that it cannot wait until later, when you’re in a less potentially dangerous situation. Perhaps Darwin is lending a hand here?

St. Ann's Crash wall SUV Hoboken NJ

St, Ann's Crash Hoboken NJ

Entitled Bicyclists

Hoboken brimming with Entitled Bicyclists!

Entitled bicyclists in Hoboken don’t just ride the wrong way, or nearly run over pedestrians on the sidewalk. Nope.

They also lock these fruity contraptions to the front of people’s homes – and prevent access to the gated areas, as one resident tried to reason with the moron by leaving a polite note:

2nd Notice: Please do not park your bike here. It prevents access to the front gated area. If you have a problem, call my cell and we can discuss. Thanks. (Adams St. Resident)”

“Please” call my cell? So we can “discuss?” Fuck that! If that was my house, that lock would have been sawed off – and the sign would have said “FREE BIKE. PLEASE TAKE.”

You can’t reason with these people. They’ll unknowingly step all over you. Grow a pair and take matters in your own hands.

Entitled bicyclists in Hoboken NJ

[Click to continue reading the rest....]

Statue Theft FAIL in Hoboken

Weakling punks FAIL at Statue Theft in Hoboken

Here we go again with another nefarious video capture in front of Muller Insurance at 930 Washington Street this summer.

“It shows 4 frat boys trying to steal a decorative garden statue. Luckily we thought to cement it and bury it so they try – but honestly can’t remove it. It’s funny but ridiculous – no one wants us to have a nice main street I guess?”

The good thing is that whomever these “frat boys” were, they certainly were not MEAT HEADS on some football team. Because then, the statue probably would have been damaged. Pencil-neck nerds who get sweaty using anything other than a touch-screen computer are no match for heavy landscaping. They probably dropped their pints of piss-water beer several times throughout the night as well.

Victory!