Let’s get ready to RUMBLE!

Let’s get ready to Rumble on Willow Avenue: Unnecessary waste!

Hoboken WTF File Rumble StripsWe’ve already talked about the nonsensical “change” that was recently implemented on Willow Avenue uptown: Reverse-angle parking.

We like to call it “change just for the sake of change, nothing else.” You know, everything has pros and cons. Why not just leave it the way it was for like a thousand years? No, some “forward thinking” person had to go muck it up. But that meager two-block “upgrade” came with (holy crap) a TON of “add-ons” that are downright LUDICROUS.

Property taxpayer funded “road improvement fund” (in perpetuity)

For one – there are more bollards than pins in a 70’s bowling alley. These things will get tossed around like crack whores (on a good day).

What does that mean to you? Well – a constant stream of YOUR MONEY for road crews, suppliers, contractors, etc. In other words – the more complicated you make it – the more complicated it is to maintain. And that much more of your money siphoned to maintain this newfangled “status quo.”

I mean at this point might as well have dancing midgets and monkeys to complete the four-ring circus this area has become. Maybe at least a few of us might get a few chuckles to make the day more bearable.

bollard central in Hoboken NJ on willow ave

You think rumble strips interrupt a Facebook chat? Ha!

Next dopey “upgrade” are these “rumble strips” installed part of the way. In theory, so-called “studies” have shown they have an impact on “driver awareness” to some degree (i.e., waking up a drunk before he plows into a toll plaza.) But we disagree.

Going 25mph on Willow – these “money strips” (my phrase – copyright pending) – do NOTHING to change the awareness of a Hoboken driver who’s busy texting, updating, and applying makeup all while enjoying a nice espresso in the car. They probably don’t even have nerves on any part of their body but their finger-tips anymore.

But the DOWNSIDE to these (faux) “safety strips” is – that now residents who live immediately near will hear a CONSTANT “bu-bu-bu-bump” 20x each and every time the light at 12th Street changes.

Me? That would lull me to sleep (like counting sheep – I’m lucky like that), but I can bet there are many who will be kept awake (and probably lose their job as a result) from this DRONING sound that is nothing more than the hand of the government trying harder to control the herd.

Bike lane paint weighs more than all bikes in Hoboken

I was watching this crew of five apply bike lane paint to the road. I swear you could have painted like 100 apartments with the amount of toxic material there were throwing down. I can imagine autism rates for newborns along this stretch to rank in the upper percentiles for sure!

For what?

It’s not like this is “magic paint” that will create an impenetrable barrier that protects bikers from inattentive drivers (or vice versa). No. This paint will evaporate like Don Zimmerman’s campaign promises and be a faded memory come this March after another brutal winter. We’ll be there to document it (and any band-aiding cheats they try to sneak in).

Willow Ave Rumble Chemicals Hoboken NJ

Again – as you see these “implements” unfolding before your very eyes – ask: Qui Bono? Is it for votes? Contracts? Or what? How did we survive up to this point without them? There has to be a better way! Because this has now become anti-progress.

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2 Comments on "Let’s get ready to RUMBLE!"

2 years 1 month ago

I live in the area, and today was my first time in the area during school dismissal. What a disaster. Cars were double parked down the whole block, with little to no space for cars to drive north on Willow. If they want this to work, we need the cops to strictly enforce no double parking here, because it just makes it much more dangerous.

2 years 1 month ago

Was on the fence about this. Because I like improvements and smooth pavement. Take a step back and realize that all of this costs money and eradicates the requirement to think clearly and carefully monitor your environment. Felt like I was in some amusement park for dolts.