Kure Pilates by Krysta
Kure Pilates – 401 Bloomfield St. – Hoboken, NJ
Taking the place of the doomed K.C. Kids Consignment shop at 4th & Bloomfield is Kure Pilates by Krysta (K’s everywhere, yiKes!)
Kure Pilates presents themselves as enablers of helping people “reach their full mind-body potential,” specifically by “enhancing the intrinsic functionality of the body; core strength, lean muscle, and lengthening will be created allowing for greater physiological effectiveness.”
Sessions are around $90 apiece (55 minutes), and “40 packs” can be had for the chump-change amount of only $2900.00! If you want to “workout” 3x a week, you can even buy annual memberships for a paltry $10,500 a year! (Yes, you read that right – an annual “gym membership” for a smidge over TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS PER YEAR. Note that Planet Fitness is just $120 per year – unlimited workouts).
Sure, “workout” methodologies all have their loyal followers (crossfit, zumba, pilates, etc.) and arguing with them is pointless – but at what point do people realize it’s not the fancy exercises that would help the most? 95% of your condition is attributed to what you put in your mouth. And having an active lifestyle should be more than enough. All it takes is some dopey celebrity to say “I do pilates” in a
brainwashing rag magazine article and all of a sudden everyone wants to mimic it.
Ah, but if you can update your timeline and impress your friends with your workout – well, then it must be worth it!